June 5th 2013
In a EXCLUSIVE
dealing with
Mental Health
What to do if you start Hearing Voices?
Now most people would think it is the End of The World if you
start hearing voices
but it does not have to be that way
(unless of course the voices are saying its the End of the World)
But here are some easy Steps you can take
to Minimise and accommodate the Voices
One.
How Long are the Voices here to stay?
Do Not Freak Out.
The Voices your hearing may not be here to stay
they may be just doing a sort of
Drive By Hi how you going
and be gone soon
They may only be around for a week.
What you want to do is talk to the Voices and try to get an idea
of how long they plan to stay around in your head.
If they seem to duck these questions there is a good chance
they may be holding up in your head for a
Month or a few years at the worst
or
Worst case Scenario
its permanent in that case
kiss your privacy good by.
Two
Get to Know the Voices
I can not stress how important it is to
get to know the voices
The more you know about these "people"
illegally taking
"Time Share"
in your brain
The easier it is for you to work out if you need to get rid of them
or let them stay around for a while
For instance if your hearing voices from
Einstein
Cool, you can learn some really cool stuff from that guy
But say what if your hearing voices
from
Hitler
That could get quite annoying
So ask the voices some questions
Try to get their Name, see want they want,
Try to work out if they
plan to be staying around for
awhile
The more you know about these Voices
the better armed you are at dealing with them.
Three
Negotiate with the Voices
Now depending on "Who" has shacked up in your brain
depends on whether you can negotiate with them
See you cant be at Work, or School or out Driving
On a Date or Working with Heavy Machinery and
the Voices start to take over
that is inconsiderate and unfair
They are living in your brain they need to respect your wishes.
You need to say to the Voices.
Hey, i need to go to work between 8-5 so guys and girls
and that voice that says he is an alien
Please i do not want to hear from you between then
But hey after work if you want i will go home and
How bout we listen to this song
WARNING EXPLICIT LANGUAGE
Or
This song
WARNING EXPLICIT LANGUAGE
Four
Finding out who to Press "Mute" on.
(Think of the voices as a Radio Station,
you need to learn how to turn the volume down or
at least change the channel)
By now you should have a good idea who these voices are
And what they want
But you need to test them
And you just did by listening to that song
Lets say a "Voice" in your head does not like this song
You have to ask your self
Can i really have a voice living in my head that does
not enjoy this song
(see future Step 5 on Getting rid of unwanted Voices)
Also if you start listening to this song and lets say
"Voices"
are telling you to do some really bad things to this man
You do no want that person hanging around in your head.
Try to get their Name, see want they want,
Try to work out if they
plan to be staying around for
awhile
The more you know about these Voices
the better armed you are at dealing with them.
Three
Negotiate with the Voices
Now depending on "Who" has shacked up in your brain
depends on whether you can negotiate with them
See you cant be at Work, or School or out Driving
On a Date or Working with Heavy Machinery and
the Voices start to take over
that is inconsiderate and unfair
They are living in your brain they need to respect your wishes.
You need to say to the Voices.
Hey, i need to go to work between 8-5 so guys and girls
and that voice that says he is an alien
Please i do not want to hear from you between then
But hey after work if you want i will go home and
How bout we listen to this song
WARNING EXPLICIT LANGUAGE
Or
This song
WARNING EXPLICIT LANGUAGE
Four
Finding out who to Press "Mute" on.
(Think of the voices as a Radio Station,
you need to learn how to turn the volume down or
at least change the channel)
By now you should have a good idea who these voices are
And what they want
But you need to test them
And you just did by listening to that song
Lets say a "Voice" in your head does not like this song
You have to ask your self
Can i really have a voice living in my head that does
not enjoy this song
(see future Step 5 on Getting rid of unwanted Voices)
Also if you start listening to this song and lets say
"Voices"
are telling you to do some really bad things to this man
You do no want that person hanging around in your head.
Also lets say a "Voice" pops up and says
"stupid [insert racial slur here] music, turn that shit off"
"stupid [insert racial slur here] music, turn that shit off"
Once again that is not someone you want hanging around in your head.
So use the song as a Test to gauge if the voices are being honest with you
or if they are lying to you. and are just a bunch of
Racists
Five
Getting rid of Unwanted Voices
Now once again
Depending on
Who the voices are depends on how easy it is to get rid of them.
Sometimes it is as simple as
ignoring the "voices"
after a while they go away and realise you are not listening any-more
sometimes they are more persistent
Especially any voices from the Future
as they always seem to protest they know what is going to happen
Sometimes you need to just
Drown the voices out with other more awesome voices
WARNING EXPLICIT LANGUAGE
Getting rid of Unwanted Voices
Now once again
Depending on
Who the voices are depends on how easy it is to get rid of them.
Sometimes it is as simple as
ignoring the "voices"
after a while they go away and realise you are not listening any-more
sometimes they are more persistent
Especially any voices from the Future
as they always seem to protest they know what is going to happen
Sometimes you need to just
Drown the voices out with other more awesome voices
WARNING EXPLICIT LANGUAGE
In the extreme cases you may need to consult your doctor
and get some medication
Six
How to deal with Religious Voices
Religious "Voices" are difficult to deal with especially
if you are dealing with the
Demon variety
who usually always never tells you their real name
and then when you try to go on-line
and search up some info on them all you get is crap about
The Illuminati
Meanwhile if your getting the voices of
an Arch Angel or possibly even a
Cherub or maybe Saint or a Prohphet
Well you need to ask your self
"Do i really want to go "Public" with this?
(see Step 14 "Going Public with your Condition")
as throughout history most people that have
proclaimed hearing voices from
Religious Deities often end up in
a Mental Hospital or
if it was
1612
Burnt at the stake for heresy
So you really want to think long and hard before you
admit to any one
"Those are the Voices" you are hearing
If you are pushed to tell people who and what the voices are
say something like
"oh they voices are just from a magical Unicorn known as
Charlie
SPECIAL ANNEX: The Voice is the Devil or Lucifer
(please return in the future, as there is to much to cover now.)
Seven
Dealing with Presidents
See
Whitehouse.gov
Eight
Dealing with the the Voices of the
Founding Fathers
No not those founding fathers the other ones
Yes those Founding Fathers.
Whenever dealing with Presidents or Prime Ministers
Show some respect you never know it could
actually be them talking to you
But most often or not depending on your level of
Education and knowledge of the History of these individuals
There is a good chance another "Voice" is trying to hide and pretend to be
one of these voices so you will not get rid of them.
So be weary when dealing with Voices proclaiming to be
President or Prime Ministers or even Kings or Queens
On the one hand if it is that person you do not want to
get them angry as they probably have some good stories to tell you
On the other hand, they could be one of those "Voices" you have been trying to
get rid of hiding out as a President or Prime Minister
.
Nine
Dealing with Age Difference with Voices
The Difference in Age between yourself and the
"Voices"
can sometimes be quite difficult to deal with.
If your a 35 year old male and your hearing the voices of a
16 year old who only wants to hear
this song, and wont stop pestering you until you play this song
then sometimes its just easier to give in.
Or Alternatively
What if your a 16 year old girl and the
"Voices" are a
35 year old man trying to get you to listen to this song?
WARNING ADULT THEMES
Which leads us to our next section
Ten
Dealing with Voices from the Opposite Sex
Just because these conversations are going on in your head
Does not mean there are "Special" Rules or different ways to talk to them
The same rules apply as if you
were having a conversation with a real person
from the opposite sex
Now if your a 16 year old that would mean
one of utter confusion as the opposite sex confuse you enough already
now you have to
"talk" to them in your head
you have a hard enough time
trying to avoid them in real life
now one is living in your head.
and get some medication
Six
How to deal with Religious Voices
Religious "Voices" are difficult to deal with especially
if you are dealing with the
Demon variety
who usually always never tells you their real name
and then when you try to go on-line
and search up some info on them all you get is crap about
The Illuminati
Meanwhile if your getting the voices of
an Arch Angel or possibly even a
Cherub or maybe Saint or a Prohphet
Well you need to ask your self
"Do i really want to go "Public" with this?
(see Step 14 "Going Public with your Condition")
as throughout history most people that have
proclaimed hearing voices from
Religious Deities often end up in
a Mental Hospital or
if it was
1612
Burnt at the stake for heresy
So you really want to think long and hard before you
admit to any one
"Those are the Voices" you are hearing
If you are pushed to tell people who and what the voices are
say something like
"oh they voices are just from a magical Unicorn known as
Charlie
SPECIAL ANNEX: The Voice is the Devil or Lucifer
(please return in the future, as there is to much to cover now.)
Seven
See
Eight
No not those founding fathers the other ones
Yes those Founding Fathers.
Whenever dealing with Presidents or Prime Ministers
But most often or not depending on your level of
Nine
However if your 20 or 30 you
might entertain the idea of having someone from the
Opposite sex in your head
as they could be helpful on dates or out at parties
They could be like
"Don't forget to compliment her on her shoes"
or
"Tell him yes, you find Football Fascinating,
don't worry if he starts to get technical, we can go all
Roxanne on him."
Eleven
Dealing with Voices proclaiming to be
Secret Agents or Working for an
Undercover Secret Government Organisations
[This Answer has been left Blank Intentionally]
Though i am allowed to show this Video
Twelve
Breakups and Voices: Who is to Blame?
So by chance you found someone to love
and they love you back
and for a time there it was working
but then something happened
you don't know what and you break up
now your heart broken.
Now Break ups are difficult to deal with
even without hearing "Voices"
Already most likely your Parents, Friends, Sisters and Brothers and
other relatives are sympathetic towards you meanwhile
most likely some are probably saying
"She/he was the one"
or
"I never did like Him/Her"
So you have to deal with all that Emotional Baggage
Add on top of that
"Voices"
Chiming in and giving pointers or wanting to comment
on your relationship.
(Well if the voice was a Dr in Psychology
specialising in Relationships?)
Start asking her/him some questions
they may prove handy in working out what went wrong.
Then Drown out the Voices, both in your head
and from your friends and Parents
and find a song you like and
plug in the earphones
and turn it up
Thirteen:
Dealing with the Consequences of
doing what the Voices said to do
As noted before you could get Hitler,
or on the opposite scale Einstein
So on the one hand yeah cool, you just invented some new
Physics Formulae
All thanks to the "Voice" of Einstein in your head
and you get
a $500,000 grant to work at some University
Cool right?
Yeah but what if you get voices that tell you to
Steal a car or Rob a bank
or kill someone or
Plot world Domination
and you decide to follow them
Are you prepared for the consequences?
Are you prepared to live with the consequences of
what these "Voices" are asking you to do?
Sometimes you have to just come back to the realisation that it
is just
All in your Head.
Fourteen
Going Public with your Condition
Once again this depends on who you are hearing
and how long they are going to be around
if you have a "Guest" that is only staying around
for a week or two
Then there is no need to tell your
Boss or Teacher, or Workmates or Police Officer or
Counsellor, Parents, Loved One, Children, Dog, Cat.
You don't need to bother these people with a temporary situation
They have a lot on their mind
However if you find yourself in a situation
with a
"Permanent resident"
in your head
You may want to look into telling your friends and family about
the "Voices" as they are going to need to know some things.
Once again the decision to go Public,
is a bold and courages move
most likely some of the "Voices" may not want you to.
That"s when you know its the right thing to do.
Word of Warning: if however your "Voices" are from say
"Homicidal Killers, Hitler, or rapists, or child molesters"
One, go back to Step 5
"Getting Rid of Unwanted Voices"
Two: I know you want to be honest with you loved ones
about your new "Condition" of hearing "Voices"
but they do not need to know all the Details,
Perhaps go back to Step Six
"Dealing with Religious Voices"
and tell people your hearing the voice of a
Magical Unicorn named Charlie.
Three: Consult your Doctor
Fifteen
Having Sex: You, your Partner
and all those other people talking
Now if any voices start surfacing during the time
your making sweet sweet love to that
special someone in your life
(if that means yourself then that's fine)
But what happens when "voices" start popping into
your head during the
Act of Love Making?
Obviously you did not "Negotiate" that well
back at
Step 3 "Negotiate with your voices"
As i said before
They are living in your brain they need to respect your wishes.
If someone is "Talking" to you during
Sex
and its not the person your having sex with
then you need to
boot that voice out of your head
see
Step 5 Getting rid of Unwanted Voices
Sixteen
Voices, Money, Your Bank Account:
Do You want that or do the "Voices"?
WARNING
Be weary if any of your "Voices" start
asking you to pay for things
like new shoes, or handbags, or that new
Nail polish thats just out
or
J.Los new perfume
If this was your girlfriend i would tell you to
drop her and find a new girl
as when shit gets real you know she will not hang around
But when dealing with "voices" you can not do that.
If the "Voices" start asking you for things like
your Bank Details or your PIN or codes or
Secret Question Answers or any of the many systems
you use to protect your money
Then i recommend sending that voice on its merry way.
Once again see
Step 5 Getting rid of Unwanted Voices
In Summary
If you find yourself hearing voices, don't panic
it may just be temporary
If after a month or two you are still
"Hearing" the voices
and not the "friendly" kind
and you are having trouble hitting the "Mute" button
you may want to consult your doctor for some
Medicine.
This is not the Definitive list of ways to deal with "Voices"
But it will get you started.
NEXT MONTH: Mental Health: There is more than one of You?....
Dealing with Multiple Personality disorders.
Also Dave, Cindy, Rajesh, Chung, Roger Petrov and Ash are all saying to post this
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